When
I worked as an RA I developed a very distinct reputation with my co-workers and
the residents of the hall. I began solidifying a persona and building my reputation
the very first day of summer training. Throughout training I was a hardcore
social butterfly, I made sure to network as much as possible and to make the
most of this time to get to bond with my co-staff members especially. I was an
eager beaver to say the least when it came to paraprofessional life, I was the girl
who volunteered to do everything and made an effort to be there to help
everyone out- at the time I felt that my enthusiasm would be the best way to
establish myself as a staff member really “in it to win it” if you will. I put
my best foot forward and hope others would do the same. My main goal was to
build a very high rapport with my coworkers and to motivate all of us to think
of ourselves as a team or a family unit- life as a paraprofessional is no cake
walk, I needed to be sure I had people who had my back. To continue to solidify
my reputation I would go out of my way to really treat people well and to lend
a hand wherever possible. We had “theme days” such as ‘beach day’ and I was the
go to woman for props and costumes, I helped RAs complete bulletin boards and
door decorations for their floor and I would volunteer to do die-cuts for other
staff member. I even planned and organized a small birthday party for one of my
co-workers over the summer training session.
The
reputation I had established only blossomed as the year went on- sometimes for the
better and sometimes for the worst. As I’ve discussed in previous posts, I’m a
die-hard idealist, and as the saying goes I was definitely born in the “wrong
decade”, the 1960s and the hippie era would have been much more my cup of tea,
then the here and now. I believe in honest to goodness altruism, and I
genuinely just like being there for people, whatever their needs may be- often I
wonder if I have and overzealous need to always be the superhero, the “fixer”,
and the confidant. No back to the main attraction… I would really go out of my
way to do something if I were ever asked a favor, often to my own disadvantage.
In staff meeting, and when planning building wide programs I always volunteered
to fill the positions that no one else wanted, and in every way imaginable I would
go above and beyond the call of duty for both my residents and my co-staff.
Essentially I was the mom of the residence hall. I made soup for co-workers
when they were sick, if my residence asked me for anything I would almost drop
what I was doing to lend a hand, and I once even accompanied a resident to the
hospital to be treat for strep, because she had no one else to go with. I
wanted to be the nurturer and the “mom” and both my staff and the residence
came to see me and treat me that way.
As
every rose has its thorns, this reputation did not always work in my favor. In my
efforts and from all the good that came out of this (close friendships and the opportunity
to make an impact on someone else’s life, even in a small way) there was a
darker side to the environment this reputation created. The atmosphere I created
was a perfect storm for opportunism. Several people really used me, knowing
that I would help “no matter what” led some of my residents and co-workers to
become very expecting and demanding. As well, trying to be the perpetual
superhero, was leading me to burn out relatively quickly. I wanted to stray from
my reputation many times. Usually when I wanted to throw in the towel, I would
tell myself to suck it up and play like a champ. If I had said yes to someone
to do something I have to follow through- even if it’s a snappy and disgruntled
resident who asks you to investigate the case of her missing bed cover or and
then figure out a way for her to be refunded for if it if it cannot be
recovered, and you have 2 exams the next day, 5 bulletin boards to make and cookies
to bake for a birthday. I would figure out how to make these situations work no
matter how ludicrous or how much it put me out and deterred me from taking care
of my own life. I had ‘cashed in’ though a few times, the immediate gain
usually being free time, sleep, a night out on the town and in those moments I
would freeze that part of my life. These
days would be akin to something around the line of John Lennon’s “Lost Weekend”.
This momentary, but complete shirking allowed me to distress and regain sanity,
although the return to real life after sometimes was a bumpy ride. For very
obvious reasons, ignoring any aspect of your life even for a day, sometimes
does come with consequences.
Let me say something about the writing before getting to the substance of the piece. Some of your colorful descriptors are chosen poorly so it detracts from the rest of the writing. You use "social butterfly" where to me it doesn't fit. Butterflies flutter by. Later you write you were the mom of the residence hall. Those two images are incongruous. In fact you didn't flutter by, you had a lot of stick-to-it-ness. As you warmed up in the writing you said more what you mean, but at the beginning I had to decipher things. That's really the writer's job, not the readers.
ReplyDeleteThe situation you describe matches the prompt quite well. It's interesting you're majoring in economics given this predisposition. Social work might be a better fit. On the economics of what you wrote, it sounded like if others in the residence weren't taking advantage of you then you were doing what you wanted. Or was it a little too much up front too? That's the sort of question we'll discuss in class on Monday.